Much Longer

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I will not
write for much
longer.
I go from
ink
to lead
to nothing
as
the thoughts
of how to hide
grow stronger
and protecting
myself gets harder,
I will not write
for much longer,
no.
I will disappear
into the honour
that came from
strangers reading
these words
but I will not write
for much longer
until I have learned
how to conquer
these monsters
in my head
which eat my
peace
in pieces
of time
just enough
to leave
anxiety behind,
I will not write
for much longer,

I will not be.
I will not be
for much longer.

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